I’ve spent the last two days meeting with the global marketing partners for my company. We operate in 17 countries, so this annual meeting is always a jam-packed but productive time where we can share ideas, frustrations and collaborate.

And as you can probably imagine, it’s also filled with plenty of presentations given with sub-par English.

One country’s group included their general manager and two managers from its marketing department. The general manager speaks excellent English, while the other two speak very broken English. I probably speak for the rest of the room when I say we all assumed the GM would be giving the presentation.

But he didn’t.

He let one of his managers do the job. And let me tell you: it was rough. Yeah, we all made it through it, but it was an effort to really understand what the guy was saying, unfortunately.

I found myself frustratingly wondering, “Why doesn’t the GM hop up and take over this presentation?!?” I mean, their presentation was essentially being hijacked by a communication breakdown of epic proportions. I stared at him as he just sat and smiled, trying my best to use the Force to get him to stand up and step in.

But he didn’t. He just kept smiling.

Empowerment in Action

That’s when it hit me what was going on here. The point wasn’t about the presentation being good or understood. The point was that the presentation was simply happening.

The GM was empowering his management team. He was giving them the opportunity to grow. And in doing so, he was allowing them to make mistakes. He was even allowing his country’s presentation to fail in terms of clarity.

It was a pretty bold move, I must say. But it made me realize that this is what empowerment actually is. Empowerment isn’t so much about handing the keys over once all the ducks are in a row, and the risk is low. Empowerment is about handing the keys over a little too soon, knowing that the most growth is going to happen when one is being stretched well beyond his comfort zone. It’s more than just delegation and influence; there’s a mentoring aspect to it, as well.

For it to work, empowerment must be uncomfortable.

To be fair, the presentation wasn’t an utter failure. I think everyone there got the point. But you know what? I bet we all forget that presentation within a week. And we would have whether it had been given in perfect English or Farsi. That’s just how things are.

But I guarantee you the presenter will remember it forever.

p.s. Alienating your comfort zones seems to be a common theme in any story worth telling. I call it “moving the box.” Here’s my five-minute explanation; watch it now.

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Admit that you’re wrong. Even if you’re not.

If resolving the conflict truly is priority number one, then admit to screwing up, say you’re sorry and move on. This is what everyone else is waiting for someone to do, and yet no one has the balls to actually do it.

Sure, there are times you need to stick to your guns. But probably not as often as you think. Most of the time, just resolving the conflict would make everything better, and is the most heroic thing you could do.

You big enough to do it?

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Image credit: http://www.flickr.com/photos/shyald/408562534/

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One of the best things I’ve done this year is join a men’s bible study group that meets on Friday mornings. Now, bible studies are no stranger to me; if there was ever a church boy, it’s me. But in the past few years, I haven’t had a regular bible study where you really dig into the Word and connect with a group of guys. So that’s what I’m doing now.

This past week, as I was simply talking about God with some guys, I realized that the simple act of talking alone was transformational. Then it got me thinking about how writing, teaching and buying are very similar.

What I mean is that what we do can very much influence, even determine, what we think. And since none of us take to change easily, it’s important to realize we can use certain tools and approaches to make change easier. Here’s what I mean by that:

Talk It

Ever met a mom who can’t stop talking about her kid? It can get old pretty quick. How about Milton and his red stapler? It’s all he could talk about. What’s up with that?

The fact is we talk about what we think about. But I’ll take it a step further. We also think about what we talk about. Sure, that mom’s got kid on the brain, but talking about the kid even more is only gonna make the mom think about the kid more.

The point here is talking about something can actually help you focus on it. Take my bible study example. The very act of talking about God with some guys led to me thinking about it for quite a few days after it. Likewise, if I talk about social media for four hours a day, it’s gonna be hard for me to not think about it when I go home at night.

To focus on something more, talk about it.

Write It

I’m much better on paper than I am in person. For me, writing is an exercise I go through to figure something out. My wife likes the sweet nothings I write much more than the sweet nothings that I whisper.

In fact, I started this blog with the attitude of “just start writing.” And because of all I’ve written about to this point, I’ve figured out a lot, especially marketing. Many posts I write are actually answers to questions I’ve asked. The act of writing so that someone else can comprehend it helps my understanding tremendously.

After you talk about something and get it on your brain, start writing about it. This will force you to organize your thoughts and trim the fat.

To understand something better, write about it.

Teach It

We’ve always heard the adage that if you want to truly learn something, teach it. This is so true. Back to my bible study example, I spent about five years teaching the college and young singles bible studies at my church. While I did that, my bible knowledge and even spiritual health was at an all-time high. Since 2004, I really haven’t done much teaching, and I can see a huge effect on my personal life because of it.

Teaching is where it gets fun and scary all at the time. Often, teaching requires some kind of presentation in front of people. For most, that’s the scary part. But you could just teach one person and get the same benefit. Plus, remember, everyone’s an expert.

If you’re really trying to learn something, force yourself to teach it. Don’t wig out over what the audience thinks, either. The point is selfish right now (for you to learn it). Their learning is just an added benefit.

To truly learn something, teach it.

Buy It

There comes a time when talking, writing and teaching ain’t enough. Sometimes you need to full commit. That’s where “Buy It” comes into play.

Nothing makes you commit and focus more than investing in something. Empathizing with a charity is one thing; donating to it is completely different. Buying a product from a direct sales company is one thing; signing up for the $3k business-builder pack is completely different.

Our investments have a way of making us commit. We all need help with commitment.

In my bible study example, “buying it” could mean financially supporting a ministry, buying books for some other guys who join us, or buying seats at an event we all go to.

If you’re having trouble committing to a project, find a way to put some money on the line. Buy in. It doesn’t even have to be your money, either. If someone pays you for something ahead of completion, it has a great way of motivating you to get things done quickly.

To truly commit to something, buy it.

How about for you? Do these four pillars apply to how you work through the process of change, focus and commitment?

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Can you push through the resistance?

It’s that time of year again.

I was walking around a park near my house just the other day. I noticed a couple, probably in their 40s, or 50s, walking briskly behind me as I began. They were focused, and clearly getting a head start on their New Year’s Resolutions.

I then heard their footsteps quicken behind me. The husband passed me, then looked back and saying “C’mon, baby.” The wife quickly snipped back with “I can’t.” The husband then doubled back to encourage her, and she managed to run a few more steps, only to further confirm her sentiment with a strong “I can’t do anymore!” The husband backed off.

I know exactly what the husband was thinking at this point. He was thinking, “Oh, you don’t even know how to push yourself.” I could see it in his eyes, his posture, everything. He was a relatively fit guy, and I’d be willing to bet he’s spent plenty of his youth on sports teams, at two-a-day football practices or the like, pushing himself with 50 other guys in a time that we men eventually, somehow, consider the greatest days of our lives.

What I’m saying is he recognized that the whole point of this running thing was to push yourself into pain, because he had experienced it before. He knew what to expect. His wife clearly had not, and thought you were supposed to quit at the first inkling of discomfort.

If you’re doing anything worth its salt, whether it’s exercise or a project, you’re going to confront pain points. In his recent book Linchpin (aff.), Seth Godin calls this the resistance. It’s a very natural part of all of us humans that fights against change, against challenge. And it’s always there.

Where most people get thrown off with the resistance is that they don’t expect it. The resistance surprises them. It sneaks up on them and completely throws them off-track. It was not in their plans.

And yet the resistance always happens. So why does it surprise us?

Foresee the Obstacles

Successful people seem to expect the resistance. Even welcome it. Just like the husband running. He knew that this whole resolution required some resistance in order for it to be effective. He pushed through it.  The wife apparently was surprised by this, and it completely threw her entire plans off-track.

So here’s what you should always do: expect the resistance. In most cases, you even know what the resistance will be before you start the project. There’s that one project manager who’s gonna throw darts at your plan. The sales team isn’t gonna back your idea because it’s not their idea. It’s easier to grab a quick burger during lunch than to work out. Whatever.

When you know what the obstacle is, get a picture of it or something to represent it, pin it up on your wall, and, when it actually happens, just look at it and say “I told you so.” Then deal with it. Because you expected it.

Other times, you won’t know exactly what the obstacle will be, but you still know they’re coming. Pin up a universal picture that represents obstacles to you and refer to it.

The point here is to acknowledge your obstacles at the beginning. Don’t try to avoid them, but simply prepare for them. Push through the pain; you’ll be surprised how easily it gives up.

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Image credit: http://www.flickr.com/photos/mikebaird/

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Processes … we hate them all unless they are our own. Then we treasure it with every ounce of pride we have.

Interesting thing about working in an office: when things go wrong, the first thing we look to is creating or improving our processes. Meantime, no one wants to follow them.

Where I work, we recently updated our job request form. The old form was seriously overwhelming, and nobody wanted to fill it out. It’s so easy to try to ask for everything in a request form to make it easy on you. But what it does is make it difficult on everyone else, which means they won’t use the stupid thing. Which then makes it difficult on you, cuz they end up just emailing you everything. Backfire…

But once you do improve your process, it becomes awkward to ask people to follow it. You don’t want to come across as one of those project management prudes (cheap shot), and you feel like you’re being lazy for not just taking the request and entering it yourself. Offices are filled with hallway requests and offshoot, half-baked emails. Who are you to rock the boat?

4 Ways to Ask People to Follow Your Process

Nonetheless, if you’re going to take the time create a new process, you gotta take the time to drop a sack and force people to follow it. Here are four ways to do it (nicely):

1. Point out the benefit of getting your traffic manager involved. Where I work, Marci handles shuffling and assigning all the requests that come in. And though she’s small in size, she gets after all of us to get our crap done (she’s a Pantera fan, after all – scary). And that’s a benefit for the requestor. I find myself telling people they’ll want to submit their job via the new form rather than just count on me to pass it on because it gets Marci involved. Most people, knowing my own propensity to forget what they asked for the minute I’m out of view, are glad to take the extra minute to get the traffic manager into the picture. So position your traffic manager as a benefit.
2. Tout the automation of the form. My team came up with a genius way to use Wufoo for our change requests. While it stretches Wufoo well beyond its core purpose, it does allow us to leverage many of its automation and reporting features. So make sure people know it. For instance, “Hey John, why don’t you go ahead and submit that via the change request process. It’ll automatically assign you a tracking number, plus it’ll show up in all of our traffic reports right away.” It’s a little thing, but it’s important. Use it.
3. Remind the requestor they only have to do it once. So here’s the deal. The requestor has one request to enter. You probably get close to 5 or 10 requests a day. I doubt your job title is “Professional Form Filler-Outter,” so spread the love and ask everyone to pitch in. You can do it nicely (“John, this is about the fifth request I’ve gotten today – do you mind filling out the form so we can dig into it later?). At first, you may feel like it makes you look lazy, but it actually makes you look like someone who respects your time.
4. Don’t hold back on emails. We all like to circumvent the processes. And there’s no easier way to do it than shoot someone an email. It gives them the idea that it’s off their plate and on someone else’s, and that’s really all they care about. But you gotta push back on this, or it will never end. When you get an emailed request, just fire back with “Thanks for the head’s up. If you’ll just input this into the form, we’ll jump all over it.” You don’t have to explain yourself; just ask people to follow your stupid process.

It seems as though asking people to follow your flow should be an easy thing to do. But it’s not. Everyone, and I mean EVERYONE, prefers to follow their own idea of how to best ask you for something. Accept the human nature, try to whittle down the friction, and then stick to your guns.

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Yes, “Wade Phillips” can be a verb.

As in, “John was simply caught in a no-win situation, so I Wade Phillipsed him.”

Or …

“Even though Jane’s whole team is responsible for the project’s failure, I’m gonna have to Wade Phillips her just to make a statement.”

For those who don’t know, Wade Phillips was the coach of the Dallas Cowboys until this past Monday afternoon. And for those who don’t know, the Cowboys have much bigger problems than a bad head coach.

Perception is Reality

But perception is reality, and the simple fact is the Cowboys are sucking and the natives are restless. A sacrifice had to be offered, and it had to be Wade Phillips’ head on a platter.

This type of stuff happens all the time in business. Regardless of how a situation got to a certain point, and regardless of who is actually to blame, sometime you are simply forced to make a statement. Sometimes you have to pull someone off a project just to give the project a fighting chance. Sometimes a project just needs a big change to rejuvenate everyone. Of course, sometimes your Wade Phillips actually is the problem.

But Wade Phillipsing someone for the sake of the project is what big boys do, regardless of how fair it is. Doesn’t make everything better, and it doesn’t mean it’s right. Sometimes, it’s just necessary.

And then, of course, there are those bosses who Jerry Jones everybody ….

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You probably have purposes. As in more than one purpose.

I love the idea of “knowing our purpose” in this life, but my hunch is it’s not accurate. I hate that it only allows me one purpose. While all of us want to have our big moment that people will write books about one day and we’ll hear Whitney Houston singing “One Moment in Time” in the background, I think it actually sells the excitement of life a little short.

Ironically, I think Christians (like me) have taken this idea even further. Yes, I love the idea that God put me on this planet to do something. Wanna know what I like more? The idea that he put me on this planet to do lots of things.

The point here is not uber-spiritual. I just think we’re a culture of people putting way to much pressure on ourselves to find that “one thing” that we’re here for when we’ve all got a trunk-load of stuff that we’re probably here for. I’m all for being purpose-driven, but not so driven that the purpose that drives me crazy.

It’s a rather liberating feeling. Maybe you should try it. Give yourself a break from that overwhelming feeling that you haven’t found your thing yet. Instead, just go do that thing that makes sense right now. Do a thing, not the thing. Then do something different later. Then repeat.

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“Smoking killed far more people than terrorists ever did. It’s just not as dramatic.”

You can thank Seth Godin for that loaded byte. His post on the power of slow change makes a great point: single events don’t crush anything; series of events over time do.

On the one hand, you have something to be happy about: no individual act is make or break for you. So stop treating it that way.

On the other hand, here’s something to worry about: there are things going on right now, right in front of you that are creating some kind of future disaster. Can you afford to stop focusing on now long enough to see what now is telling you about tomorrow?

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General Dwight D. Eisenhower once said “Plans are nothing; planning is everything.” You could take that idea several different directions. I’d like to take it one step further: Planning is overrated; response is everything.

I actually think this is just another way to say what Ike said. Once you hit the battlefield, whatever your battlefield is, your plans mean nothing. You simply can’t expect the unexpected. But you can respond. And you can actually prepare to respond beforehand. You may not know what for, but you can at least make sure the things you could possibly need are available and ready when the time comes that you may need them.

I’ve yet to experience a project that follows its Gantt chart to the last detail. I’ve actually not ever seen a project manager who accurately estimated a buffer zone into a project. The fact is curveballs are coming, and it’s not plans that will deal with them. It comes down to decision and focus and action and calmness.

In my experience, people freak out more over deviating from the plan than the actual unexpected item that wasn’t planned for. Our natural reaction is to scrap a whole project once it gets off course, when a simple response and action would do the trick.

You Suck at Planning

Of course, this all assumes that our plan was good in the first place. But “the best laid plans of mice and men do often go astray.” In other words, we naturally suck at planning. We aren’t made to think too much into the future. This is why all hell breaks loose once a project nears its launch date. We humans simply can’t truly understand a concept until it’s more concrete. And that usually happens about three weeks prior to launch. I daresay we finite beings have been created by an infinite Creator who, while giving us the ability to plan and think ahead, continually makes it clear that we’re best at simply dealing with now. (He also seems to like reminding us of just how little we control, but that’s a whole other post).

So planning manages to be everything and nothing all at the same time. The key to getting the most out of planning is to put it in its place. The point of a plan is to get to a destination. A means to an end. Yet so many times, the plan is treated as though it’s the accomplishment. In the meantime, a better way to get to our destination could be passing us by as we lament falling short of our crummy plan.

The point? You suck at planning, and even when you plan well, things change. So plan on planning a poor plan, and pave the way to respond when the obstacles come.

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Personal note: I was part of a team this past week that enjoyed the rush that comes with completely missing a plan, and still making great things happen. We faced what was already a formidable giant and watched it grow to epic proportions as deadline after deadline passed us by. And we came together, divided and conquered. And we made greatness happen. How we feel about the whole experience now couldn’t have happened if we’d stuck to the plan. I’m proud of my team; moreso, I’m proud to be a part of it.

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It only takes attendance at a few meetings to identify the hat-hangers. You know the ones I’m talking about. The guy who always brings up the point that is only marginally relevant, but is brought up with such gusto and vocabulary as to assure we all know this guy knows something we don’t. Or the lady who can always, ALWAYS spot the one weak link at a kickoff meeting, and express it in a way that suggests we kill the project rather than just deal with the obstacle.

Humans instinctively look for meaning and relevance. Some much more than others. A key to surviving sanely whether at the office or among some other group of humans is to know people are normally just looking for something to hang their hat on. In the midst of this search, they express their findings most often as criticism and caution. But all they’re really trying to do is add value and input.

Of course, it’s up to you to receive it that way. It may take thick skin and some patient translation, but you can choose to react this way.

Or you can ignore them altogether, even stop inviting them to meetings.

There’s a time and place for both reactions. What’s not acceptable is letting a simple activity like hat hanging bog down greatness. So don’t let it happen. Either be the guy with the hat rack, or bring a guillotine along. It’ll solve the problem either way.

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